Being controlling....
As many of you know I will be married for 20 years this December, and what a 20 year journey it has been! I often write about the way I was in the early years of our marriage, and this is another one of "those posts". Looking back I easily see the control issues I had during the first 5 years of marriage. Because I am an anxious person, my control issues were often about trying to control life in order to keep my anxiety down. Well, it didn't really work at keeping my anxiety down and my controlling behavior put rifts between me and my husband. Besides trying to keep my anxiety down my controlling ways also got triggered when I felt insecure (an example is a previous post about fighting with my husband over his spending time with his family). Thank goodness I married a patient man who was very intuitive about my inner world and worked hard to help me feel safe and secure- because it worked! I still have moments of insecurity and controlling ways, but they are brief, and I...