As I get older..
The less I know. I have more questions than answers. There is more gray than black or white. More uncertainty, no one "right path" or "right one", more patience with myself and others. Less tolerance of B.S. Much more compassion for vulnerability and pain.
My ability to allow people to be who they are has increased, and my desire to change others has decreased. I rely more on myself to get my needs met, but enjoy my relationships more. I am much more picky about what shows or movies I watch. Less tolerance for small talk, and seek out deeper interactions, more "realness".
I have more appreciation for the "muddiness" of life, and don't expect it (or myself)to come in a neat orderly package. I like myself more and even tolerate my inconsistencies. Change in myself and others is more OK, and I don't have to insist we all stay the same.
My fears are less but more real. My opinion matters the most. Conflict isn't as scary but I still don't prefer it. I admire bravery in life and relationships. Losses are more frequent. I take more risks and encourage others to do so. That there is always someone saying the "end is near".
The insecure scared girl still gets triggered, but I know how to care for her better. I have fewer deal breakers. Self confidence is higher, as is self accountability. Because I know that my attitude is the biggest factor I have control over, I try not to wallow in self pity. The Serenity Prayer has much more meaning.
I enjoy my own company more and feel sorry for those who can't be alone. Instead of trying to fix things, I know that sitting with someone in pain is often the biggest thing we can do.
As I get older, I know that my days are numbered and that death is as natural as life, and I need to make the best of the life that I am living.
My ability to allow people to be who they are has increased, and my desire to change others has decreased. I rely more on myself to get my needs met, but enjoy my relationships more. I am much more picky about what shows or movies I watch. Less tolerance for small talk, and seek out deeper interactions, more "realness".
I have more appreciation for the "muddiness" of life, and don't expect it (or myself)to come in a neat orderly package. I like myself more and even tolerate my inconsistencies. Change in myself and others is more OK, and I don't have to insist we all stay the same.
My fears are less but more real. My opinion matters the most. Conflict isn't as scary but I still don't prefer it. I admire bravery in life and relationships. Losses are more frequent. I take more risks and encourage others to do so. That there is always someone saying the "end is near".
The insecure scared girl still gets triggered, but I know how to care for her better. I have fewer deal breakers. Self confidence is higher, as is self accountability. Because I know that my attitude is the biggest factor I have control over, I try not to wallow in self pity. The Serenity Prayer has much more meaning.
I enjoy my own company more and feel sorry for those who can't be alone. Instead of trying to fix things, I know that sitting with someone in pain is often the biggest thing we can do.
As I get older, I know that my days are numbered and that death is as natural as life, and I need to make the best of the life that I am living.
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